Change, Daily Life, Freedom, Growth, Release

The Keys in My Life

I carry 2 keys.  I only need 2 keys in daily life. I have a key chain with a car key and a house key. That’s it.  My life is simple and I can see that because I don’t carry a lot of keys anymore.

With keys come responsibility.  I remember how important grown ups keys seemed when I was a child.  Keys did important things and they were critical. You could not drive without a key. The house key was the most important. We could lock up when we left knowing it kept us safe. . And Mom and Dad had the keys to open it. Their key rings were full of mysterious keys that must have held important meaning in their life. As a child that is what I thought. All adults had full key rings, they must be so very important. The jingling sound of keys, a sound we all can relate to.

I remember getting my first house key and how grown up that felt.  The responsibility was impressed upon me. Don’t lose the key, don’t share the key, only use the key for these reasons.  We are giving this to you because you are old enough to handle the responsibility of having a key to our house. And it was a responsibility and it did move me along the path of growing up.

Time goes by, I start collecting my own keys. Car keys, door keys, keys for works, safe deposit box keys, my sisters house, my moms house key, key to the storage unit, key to this or that. And my key ring grew, I must be very important.  I have all these things I am responsible for.

At some point the keys are out of control. My home had different keys for the front door, the side door, the laundry room door, the bedroom door, the outside bonus room door. The house needed its own key ring. And then I had keys from my relatives houses, they would change their locks, I would get more keys. It started getting confusing, I had work keys, so I could open up. Then I would change jobs and get more work keys. I had car keys. In the old days you had door key, ignition key, gas cap key and maybe trunk key. And of course I had to have multiple keys in case I lost my keys.  So when I got a new car or a new job or changed the the locks the multiple keys never really moved away. And it was confusing, and overwhelming.  I think my experience is pretty normal.

When I moved things changed, I threw away all the keys. My mom had passed, didn’t need her key. My sister moved, her keys were obsolete, I don’t have new ones. All those keys to my life…gone.  They were so very important and in the end, not important at all. They did not make m2015-07-31 19.18.23e important or valuable.  They took up space and energy.  I don’t need my life to be that complex.  These are my keys now, a door key and a the key to my truck.  Simple, simple, simple. I do have the key to my son’s apartment because he needed a safe place to keep one. I don’t carry it or use, it is not mine. I also have 1 other key ring with my storage shed key and my apartment storage key. I barely use those and I don’t carry them.

So this, this way of living that does not include collecting keys and the strings that go with them, is freeing to me. I like that my life is simplified and easy.  I have whittled down and identified what is important and what is mine to keep track of. I have let go of the rest. If I do this with keys I can expand it. What else am I carrying in my life that really is not mine or is unnecessary? What else am I carrying that I have collected with the idea it made me important or valuable?  Be it ideas, beliefs or tangible items, what can I let go of?  What no longer serves the life I choose for myself?  I guess these questions will be answered along the way.

Here is to freedom!

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Change, Daily Life, friendship, Gratitude, Inspiration, Love, Relationships, Self

We Have to Love What Is

We have to love what is.  We have to. I  will say it again, We have to love what is.  If we want to be happy, if we want to have joy, if we want to have peace, we have to love what is. We awaken each day and are presented with our life.  We get to choose how we spend that day.  Because the day is, what the day is. Our lives have taken us down many paths, we have wandered through people, places, events, circumstances and they have all brought us to this moment. And we waken to it. And it is ours to live it as we choose.

And where we go from there is what defines us.  Here is what is for sure, life is going to change. It could be subtle and slow, it could be overnight, it could come in like tidal wave. And sometimes the change is hard to love, even impossible in that moment.  But there always another piece of life to love even in the midst of grief or disaster.

For instance, when I lost my home that was hard to love. I had to watch my son move out on his own under less than ideal circumstances. I had to hand over keys to a home I had married in, raised my child, and pretty much grown up there. It was my grandmothers house before me.  So how to love anything about that?  Well I get to see my son grow into a man.  He takes care of himself, supports himself, he is building his life.  He was stuck before, now he is growing. For myself, that house was draining me.  It was too much for me, too large. I did not have money to keep it up as it needed. The house took all of my energy and money. So for me, my life is easier. I have much less responsibilities and headaches. I have time now to look around and see what else I want in my life.  I feel less stressed, less burdened and way more free. So everything has shifted, I know now that was a gift of growth for my son and myself.

But back to today and loving what is.  If we close our eyes to the joys of today because we are missing the past or uncomfortable with the present we cheat ourselves.   We have to live in today, and we have to love today, just as it is.  Say yesterday was this beautiful blue sky day you spent in joy.  That is awesome, but it is done. Now today, the sky is grey. Love the grey day.  Don’t miss today because we are looking backwards. Take the joys of yesterday, and the sorrows, and the lessons and move into today and love what is.  This is our gift of today, there is always something to love.

“You don’t get to vote on what is.
Have you noticed?”

~ Byron Katie ~

Life is going to happen, it is going to take weird and confusing twists and turns.  As I said in my last post I did not think my life was headed in this direction. I can sit in the past and be sad that people I love have passed on, or I can celebrate that so many people I love are here and welcome my love. I can mourn lost relationships and have a pity party, or I can be ready  for  the next amazing relationship  headed my way and be happy that I am open for that.  I can be sad that my sister has been through hell physically. or I can be so very amazed at how strong she is and inspired by her fight to have her life back.  I can feel lonely that my friend moved away, or I can love her so much that I am happy she is happy. I can accept that in today’s world distance means nothing, and that the love does not change.   I can look around and see all the amazing people at my fingertips, friends and family that I can reach out and hug. They are here today, Love what is.  I can feel a longing for a time when I lived with my son, his girlfriend and our dogs.  It was a perfect moment and a gift. Or I can see that he is stronger, smarter, more confident and that she is in a loving relationships and so very happy. And they both still love me and want me in their lives. How about I  be happy with that? How about I love what is.

My life is not perfect, but I am damn well going to love it anyway.  I am going to love what I have today, I going to love whatever is coming my way. I am going to enjoy each piece, each step of the journey, each lesson, each joy, every gift.  Because I don’t want to waste my days, I want them to spent in love and joy and peace and laughter. I know that is a tall order,. I know I will trip up and that is fine, I will love that part also. And then I will stand up and remember who I am and why I am here. And that is to be Love

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