Courage, Daily Life, Gratitude, Honesty, Love, Self, Soul, Spirit

In the Silence I Find Myself

It is in the silent spot I can hear myself think. The sweet sweet sound of silence is so hard to find these days.  I know when I awaken I have a moment of silence.  I may hear the sounds of nature, perhaps rain or a bird. or the occasional car go by, but mostly it is a silent moment to start the day.

What I know is in those quiet moments what is most weighing on my mind appears.  If I wake up and something comes immediately to mind I know it is something I need to take care of.  It can be anything from a person, to finances, maybe something broken, anything. If it finds me in the silence I have to deal with it.  I can hide behind noise during the day.  I can block out the problems with music, tv, voices, the sounds of life.  But I cannot block out the silence.  And in the silence my soul speaks.

The best days are like today.  I awaken and hear the silence, no words coming from my mind. I let the morning come to me, unfold around me. I have a moment for gratitude, I have a moment for peace.  I embrace the quiet of the morning, I drink it in. Gradually the “have to’s” arrive, but nothing weighing. I have to pee, the coffee smells good, life is calling. And I let the silence go.

We need to find God, and he cannot be found in noise and restlessness. God is the friend of silence. See how nature – trees, flowers, grass- grows in silence; see the stars, the moon and the sun, how they move in silence… We need silence to be able to touch souls.

I need this in my life.  I am calmest and most at peace when I have silence commonly in my life.  I can find it outdoors, walking the trails, by the lake.  I can hear the wind, the call of the geese and singing of the birds.  I hear a rustle in the trees but these sounds magnify the silence and make it beautiful. But mostly I can hear my thoughts, my prayers, my problems, my answers, and my dreams.

It is in the silence I find the motivation to go on.  To engage with the world. I can come into the world, and it’s noise, whole and calm,  maneuvering through all it needs of me.  The other day I was in line just ordering a sandwich and simultaneously 3 people were talking to me.  All about different topics. It was a little whirlwind of words.  And so I stood there for a just a second, and then said “I can only have one conversation at a time”. Took a breathe and handled them, one at a time. My point is I came into that place whole and centered.  And because I have those resources within me I can handle the chaos.

I find that the world is noisy, loud, demanding.  Cell phones, Ipods, traffic, horns, voices, canned music, tv, office machinery, everything is designed to grab us and take our attention. And people, we have so many people now.  I live in a small town and sometimes feel the crowding of people all in the same space.  When I am in the city, at some point, I am just overwhelmed with the amount of people and the noise.  I need to be back home.

So in the middle of all this how do we hold our center?  Because life is going to happen and we better be ready.  I have to go to work,. I have people I love needing my attention.  I have friends who contact me, want to talk, connect. I like social media, I want to engage.  I like music, tv and the radio.  I want to have all of these in my life. They keep me juicy, they keep me engaged and alive. And yet, it can be really draining and overwhelming.

I could meditate every day, but I don’t.  I have not found that sweet spot where it fits naturally into my life.  So I search for those natural moments of calm and peace and silence.  I find it when I awaken, and I listen to my thoughts.  I find it when I come home before the evening takes over, and I breathe for a minute.  I find it when I walk in nature,  hearing the sounds of Spirit through the trees and in the flapping of the birds wings. I  find answers in the silence.  I find it in those pauses of conversation, those comfortable silences.  I find it driving when I can get lost in my thoughts.  I find it exercising, when I can use the music as a background and let my mind rest. And sometimes silence comes as a gift.  When I am worn out, when things are difficult, when I am scared or lonely.  A moment of silence blesses me and carries me.  It lets me rest, it gives me peace, it fills my soul.

So for the silent moments that come your way, treasure them.  They are a gift that can soothe your soul, ease your mind and set you free.

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Daily Life, Self

Listening to Myself

When I got off work today I was in this weird bad mood. Other than the fact I had way more work than time to do it, nothing really went wrong. I was umm, kind of edgy, irritable, a little sad, and not fun to be around.  So my plan was to go to the gym. I changed into my workout clothes, got in my truck, started driving to the gym, and no, that did not feel right. I just could not take the thought of being around noise and people and noisy people, clanging machines, all of that.

So I went where I go when my soul needs to breathe.  We have a lake here with a dam about 3/4 mile across.  Lots of people walk on it,  2014-05-09 11.43.12here is a picture.  I plug in my Ipod, turn up the music and take off.  I see people, but I don;t have to talk to them. I nod and keep moving.  I walked the dam 4 times I think, it felt good.  And by the time I was done, so was my bad mood.  I felt calm, I felt centered, I felt back in my body.

I can’t tell what triggered the mood and maybe it doesn’t matter.  What matters is how I handled it.  I could have went home and isolated myself. I could have went to the gym, following my plan.  I am so happy I listened to my soul.  I said what do I really need right now?  How can I take control of my mood instead of letting it control me?

So the next you don’t feel quite right, somethings off but you are not sure what, take stock.  Ask yourself, what do I really need right now. Throw the plan out the window and be willing to make a change. Take a walk, see a movie, call a friend, fly a kite, meditate, the what you do does not matter.  Why you do it does.  Do it because it is what calls you, it is what heals you.  Love yourself so you can love others.  I ended my day listening to a friend who needed to share a problem.  Because I gave myself space and time,  I had the space and time for her.  We both won, because I listened to myself and responded to that call.

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Inspiration

Our Next Breath

Our only guarantee is our next breath.  Anything beyond that is not a given.  Life can change fast.  The phone could ring, a knock on the door, a heart attack, an earthquake, a tsunami, anything. Or it could amazing…the love of my life could be the one knocking, the phone call could be a grandchild on the way, maybe win the lottery, a longed for promotion, again anything.  But life would change. So here is what we have, right now, this moment.  And how we spend is what makes up our life.

This is not intended to give the impression that we should live each moment in terror, fear or anticipation of what could happen next.  Its more to awaken ourselves to all the possibilities and very preciousness of our days.  Each time I see you could be my last, how do I want to leave that?  What things am I leaving unsaid?  What am I taking for granted? Your friendship, your love, the blue sky, my next breath?

I know I cannot live without some semblance of security and comfortableness.  To live at such a high level of intensity would defeat the very pieces of my life I find comforting, relaxing and joyful.  But what I can do is recognize everything is fluid, everything will change and appreciate the moments I am given. I can spend these moments in love, grace, humility, and gratefulness.  If I can let those features fill my moments then I will have lived a blessed life.

Inhale, exhale and live in joy…………..

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